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Old 16th November 2000, 07:49
Skinner Skinner is offline
Join Date: Oct 2000
Posts: 56

Lighten up! Marriage is for life; in sickness and in health for richer and for poorer. Should we not take this commitment seriously. Probably not, if we see the rate of broken marriages.

There is nothing wrong with foolish dreams, but is it not wrong when those dreams turn in to reality of nightmares. You are correct in inference that it is not my position to pour scone on anyone, but you can not prevent my sadness at the flippant way relationships are entered into.

Does Santa Claus exist? Who are we to lie to children? BTW I would not tell a child Santa Claus doesn't exist, there too much unhappiness in the world of children without destroying this myth.

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  #9 (permalink)  
Old 21st November 2000, 09:28
alan alan is offline
Join Date: Feb 2000
Location: England
Posts: 35

skinner, this is the last time i will waste my time on you - i think you're probably a lost cause as far as love is concerned.

sometimess the longest-lasting, strongest and most loving relationships start with a glance, a chance meeting, a smile, an advert in the lonely-hearts column, a kind deed or even an internet chat or email - WHO KNOWS WHEN SOMETHING MAGICAL MIGHT HAPPEN? - it seems you want to formalise everything and start a relationship seriously with a stranger!! JUST LET ROMANCE OR FRIENDSHIP HAPPEN - NO MATTER HOW IT'S INTRODUCED.


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  #10 (permalink)  
Old 5th February 2001, 19:50
Alena Alena is offline
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Join Date: Feb 2001
Posts: 3
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Dear Alan

I am Ukrainian now living and happily married in England with my husband, we had a child in June last year - this is my second child.

I met my husband on the Internet @ http://www.onetwoone.com.

I am in contact with many Ukrainian friends who are genuine and sincere about a long and lasting relationship with a similar male. They find their home country concerning for the eventual upbringing of their families and children and this is why they look to other safer and more prosperous places around the globe.

If I can be of assistance to your search then please let me know.

Helen Wright
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  #11 (permalink)  
Old 7th February 2001, 02:49
Irena Irena is offline
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We have a woman magazine. Called “Natalie”. It’s a very fool magazine. It’s intended for stupid women dreaming to join to ”beautiful life”.
A history from this magazine. A Ukrainian girl met by Internet a American man. They both are happy. Some little details follow. This “groom” have two little American daughters. These ones are very American children (well, you understand). They are very disobedient, eat cheeps, hamburgers and drink Coca-Cola. Besides, their mother comes to them as a governess (?!!! I think that sometimes she sleeps with Dad).
Our Ukrainian hero sweeps out refuse, cooks cakes and áîðùè (borshs), cries of many many nights in her pillows… She wanna have a baby but… He doesn’t want…
Now all of them are happy.
However I have a question: “ Where our Ukraine hero works”? She works but they didn’t say where she worked.
I don’t want to hear our brides. They will lie. A friend of mine said that she was an economist in a London bank. Then I got to know she was a charlady. You’d see her here: LADY! “I despises YOUR Ukraine” – she said. “But who and what are you THERE?” - I asked.
I understand if a girl go to west to learn or she uses marriage with an American in order to learn, to develop herself.
However most of our Ukraine brides are maids, servants cooking cakes “there”. No more. They can do nothing and they are deprived of their rights and depend on their husbands.
But I want to hear eye-witnesses on the other side. Our “brides” are on holiday in this question. I don’t believe any of their words.

[Edited by Irena on 7th February 2001 at 05:20]
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  #12 (permalink)  
Old 7th February 2001, 03:59
Lina Lina is offline
Join Date: Dec 2000
Posts: 311
Bad attitude Irena! Very bad!

OK! That's true...Some girls are not happy in this type of marriage.(I think I was already writting about it somewhere). Some will lie in order to seem better in front of old girlfriends...It's also possible. But let's not consider all of them being deprived of rights...bla..bla..bla.

MOST of the brides have terrible problems with the language. It takes some at least a year to learn how to speak correctly! Which is kind of sad, but it slows down the overall prosses of getting their life back
Another problem is a totally different country. One has to get used to that and learn a different, I say DIFFERENT, standards/priorities etc...of that country. That also takes time!

Then, coming back to work...Sadly most of our wonderful Ukrainian diplomas are not worth very much!!! Very often, "brides", and other Ukrainian immigrans have to go back to college to evaluate them, which sometimes might mean take additional tests or classes.(see problem#1). Although, I think it's very possible for "brides" with some kind of financial background and good English to find a work in the area of their education. I know a girl who did it.

As for myself...I went back to college to study...and I totally changed my major. I'm still young and not in a mood to have children yet and my husband totally respects my decision. So do not portray all of us like slaves, please!!! I know what I am talking about, because I have much more real stories happening in front of my eyes and NOT from the articals of the magazine!

[Edited by Lina on 7th February 2001 at 18:17]
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  #13 (permalink)  
Old 7th February 2001, 16:10
LippyChick LippyChick is offline
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Posts: 241
It's an old chestnut, but why do western men want women from eastern Europe? Is it because we / they are the most beautiful in the world? Is it because we / they are strong of mind & personality. OR is it because women from eastern Europe are perceived as un-liberated and pose no treat to the male ego?

The debate always descends in to a slanging match, but that's my two pennies.

What we want and what we need have been confused...
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  #14 (permalink)  
Old 7th February 2001, 17:04
Lina Lina is offline
Join Date: Dec 2000
Posts: 311
It's an old chestnut, but why do western men want women from eastern Europe? Is it because we / they are the most beautiful in the world? Is it because we / they are strong of mind & personality. OR is it because women from eastern Europe are perceived as un-liberated and pose no treat to the male ego?

Interesting point of view LippyChick!
There is some truth to it....
I think Eastern Europe became so attractive for several reasons:
1. Beautiful??? Hell yeah!!!
There is a whole bunch of girls (pretty girls) on the Internet willing to find husbands and accepting 10-15 year old difference...If you are un unmarried man in your mid thirties, in your country, you will not probably find a 19-20 year old wihte femail, to marry you!?? So, here you go Yuppie! What a cath!

2. Pleasing a man's ego?..True, to some point... (Though I believe the main reason is #1) But, let's look at another side! "Brides" do not take take a lot things for granted as much as American, British women etc...because they are comming from a country with a poorer developed economy, which makes them different from American/British women, who did not experienced the whole beauty of living in the post-communist society...Does the fact that a woman values a man's capability to actually make enough money to pay for a house, two cars, etc... and still be able to mantain a good life pleases the man's ego? Probably true...Though, I am not totally sure that grooms get their ideal "victorian type" of a woman in Russian brides. Because of...Even though Ukraine is not a top 10 developed economy country, we are not stuck in the 19th century...Plus, communism made a lot of women work in the past. Therefoer, the girls getting married today had working mothers and that was a Norm, and not backing cakes all day long...or am I mistaken? (Though I do not see anything wrong with baking cakes...)

3. Unliberated??? You mean controll? ( I hope I got the meaning of what you wanted to say by this, if I got it wrong, please correct me) The fact that a man will have a lot of control over a woman is true. It's natural to some point, when you move to antoher country(read above in my answer to Irena). Though, the fact that they are doing it because of control seems rather stupid! (I'm not getting personal here ) May be, only if they are some kind of maniacs...(there could be some maniacs around but can we call all of them maniacs?)
Otherwise, its' kind of a pain, I think, to have all this control.... to teach someone how to drive a car, use a credit card, speak English, help to make a choise of products in the supermarket, explain what the hec is a mexican salsa, and that a you do not put a little bone down the garbage disposal etc , etc....(I have a lot of examples here) Sounds fun, dosen't it? May be it's more of baby-sitting than control?
What really bothers me that all "grooms" picture all American/British ladies as some kind of deamons! But that's just my personal problem...


[Edited by Lina on 8th February 2001 at 09:20]
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