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Tracker9195 8th October 2010 13:06

Age difference between men and women
I have been to the Ukraine twice this summer after joining some dating sites that highlight Ukrainian women. I am suspicious of the apparent willingness of women half my age to date and maybe marry someday. I am 50 and I am receiving requests from lots of women around 24-27 years old. Can someone who is familiar with Ukrainain women and their relatiohship values comment this subject? I am concerned that it may be more of a "fun thing" for a 25 year old to be entertained and receive lots of attention, by someone like me. I am seeking the love of my life to marry.

Gotno Gizmo 8th October 2010 18:10

Be careful !
The published life expectancy from many sources for Ukranian males is put at 62 years of age. I'm aware that many Ukrainian women find themselves widows as young as 45. High alcohol consumption, heavy smoking and poor industrial work environments have been contributory factors over recent years. It follows therefore that women here have a greater preparedness to accept an older man, particularly if he is a clean living, non driking man with secure income. However, I believe that young attractive Ukrainian women looking for a man twice her age may well be motivated primarily with the prospect of access to greater wealth and /or a visa enrty to a percieved more attractive country, rather than looking genuinely for a future husband who will be the father of her children.
I would suggest you confine your search to a lady of not more than 15 years younger than yourself. But their are many fine ladies available.
Good luck!

Tracker9195 9th October 2010 23:15

Thank you Gotno
Hi Gotno,

I observed the very things you mentioned about the men when I was in the Ukraine last summer. I also talked to quite a few people and got the impression that women are open to an older man if he is in shape, healthy, non-smoking, etc. I am not bothered by a woman wanting to upgrade her lifestyle, chances in life and so on. Don't we all? I am more concerned that there being genuine attraction, genuine love, etc. You are right there are many beautiful women in that region.


ace-interpreter 21st December 2010 16:12

Tim, if you really want to find someone serious and get married do not look for so young women. to have fun with them yes you are welcome but something serious i do not think it will work out.
try age groupe 35-42 y.o.

romanec 8th September 2011 18:06

I happened to find an attractive Ukrainian woman who was nearly half my age and we have been living together happily for six years now. I realized when we first got together that her feelings for me might not be sincere; might not last; might not even be there but I took the chance to, at the very least, spend some intimate time with a beautiful woman. We are married now and have twins. This is turning out to be a happy story and I am well aware that many such situations turn out differently. If things hadn't worked out in this relationship, I would have tried again. And again. There are probably practical reasons why young women allow themselves to be courted by older men, but, then again, love is love and you may find it lurking in odd places. Good luck

Wolodymyr 9th September 2011 12:00

Tim, first the hopefully objectiveand insightful lecture from experience;

1 Never lose sight of the fact that women of any nationality, seeking men from another country are mostly those from a poorer country seeking a man from a wealthier country. Just keep that one in the back of your mind at all times because it can help you to question and understand their motives / objectives.

2 There are various reasons that motivate them to do this, some good and some bad. Your own ability to recognise sincerity is helpful, and avoiding a situation where the motive is simply extortion is the most important advice. This can be a very grey area, in the worst case a few may be motivated to 'get money' without any intention of a long term commitment, they will take what they can and run. A few may be motivated by a need to help their family - noble in it's own way and if that person is also sincere, and the prospective husband has the ability to help, it can work.

3 The most important thing is that the monetary issues, although they are usually there, should be secondary, and the sincerity of the girl and her intention to fall in love and make a commitment is all important. The problem here is how to recognise that and how to be sure, this is very difficult to do without spending a significant amount of time together and with her family. Across the internet only works if there is plenty of video conferencing including family, but it has to be followed up by time with the girl and family to remove any uncertainty / risk from the situation.

4 Any broker or dating site has to have good credentials and a clearly displayed commitment to avoid it's customer's being scammed, so that you feel that you can trust them, and their prospective clients.

5 All the above is important because it helps avoid making a mistake, as this is your future life, it is critical that you do not take a big risk with the consequences it can bring. So the best advice is - don't fall in love until you are sure it is safe to do so:)

6 Age difference is not the biggest issue, but maturity and goals are, you may not get on with someone half your age, as she is more likely to be less mature, mentally / philosophically I mean, there has to be a meeting of minds and the ability to see eye to eye and to communicate well. If you are from different cultures, a lot of eye to eye communication is necessary to 'understand' each other, language difficulties in both directions can also promote misunderstandings - you have to be able to deal with that rationally. It's worth saying that in a lot of cases, their perception is that older men are more stable, loving, reliable and loyal, and that is generally true, and the distrust / risk with men of their own age is the motivation in looking for an older partner.

7 Despite the sometimes gloomy picture painted, that applies to a minority, there are lots and lots of sincere ladies out there, and treating the above as good advice, and trusting that you can achieve a loving and permanent relationship in this way is key, as long as you do not get overwhelmed or fall in love with the visually attractive woman before knowing what is under the skin (beauty is skin deep as they say). It is also good to do a little self examination and ask not only whether she will be good for you, but whether you will be good for her.

ok lecture over; my credentials, in the first point I said 'any nationality', as although there are cultural differences, people are the same the world over, I am married to a beautiful and sincere Thai lady who is 17 years younger, I am 59, she is 42 and we have been happily married for 6 years. We send a little money to help her mother (father died) and also to my father's family in Ukraine. I was divorced, lived in Thailand long enough to speak and write the language, so I had a head start in knowing the people, culture and how to recognise sincerity in a person of a different nationality / culture. The difference will not be so great for you so that will help, so take care and good luck.

Gotno Gizmo 9th September 2011 19:52

I totally agree with Wolodymyr
First class advice, it was a pleasure to read the previous post and I cannot agree more with your sentiments.

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