Someone's got a joke for you guys.

[Zhenya]

Hello every either little or big, clever or smart, sober or drunk, lazy or hardworking, friendly or hostile, John or Phillip, Yulia or Lilly, Grandma or Stas, Beata or anybody else (don't you think that I've forgotten your names). Are you ready to laugh? Are you ready to let some humor into your life? Are you ready to share knowledge and try to understand different cultures?
Are you familiar with the feeling when you've read a joke on the board and then you want to recall it and you can't find it on this huge discussion board. Well now we'll concentrate our jokes on this joketelling topic. So who wants to be the first. Anybody??? Allright I do.
Scotland. Bar. A turist(T) is sitting and looking at the Loch-ness lake. When waiter(W) walks by he asks:
(T):-Excuse me, when Is the loch-ness monster usually coming out of the lake?
(W):-After the fifth shot, sir.

Here's one more for you guys:
фСПМЮКХЯРШ ЯОПЮЬХБЮЧР С кСЙЮЬЕМЙН:
-яЙНКЭЙН ЪГШЙНБ бШ ГМЮЕРЕ?
-рПШ:ПСЯЯЙХИ,АЪКНПСЯЯЙХИ Х ЮМЦКХИЯЙХИ.
-ю ЯЙЮФХРЕ ОНФЮКСИЯРЮ ВРН-МХАСДЭ ОН-ЮМЦКХИЯЙХ!
-ьОПЕУЕМ ГХ ДНИВ.
-щРН БЕДЭ МЕЛЕЖЙХИ!
-мС,ГМЮВШР,ВШРШПШ!

If someone wanna try to translate it- please do.
Regards...

Zhenya.

[johnstruthers]

Okay, a reporter asks Lukashenko how many languages he speaks. He says three, Russian, Ukrainian and English. The reporter says, say something in English, Lukashenko says, Sprechen sie deutsch. The reporter says, that's German. Lukashenko says, I know, I meant four.

[johnstruthers]

Hey, Zhenya, how do you get it to type in Cyrillic? I can get it to read it, but can't make the keyboard shift. What's the secret?

But that joke's funnier in Russian, because there is a nuance that I can't explain.

[VictoriaMasnaya]

here is my joke
what gay and bunji jumper have in common???????


don't know????????
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if they tore the robber they both in e deep *** i mean poop
ha-a
troll-girl

[This message has been edited by VictoriaMasnaya (edited 03 February 2000).]

[This message has been edited by VictoriaMasnaya (edited 03 February 2000).]

[B_Ungaro]

1.This Hungarian is kicking and beating this
coke machine. He is mad as hell. A Jewish fellow walks up and asks the Hungarian why he is so mad. The Hungarian explains that the machine has taken the money but he did
not get a coke. To which the Jewish fellow
repplied: Why did'nt I think of that.
2.Do you know how the dance LIMBO came about?
Somebody once seen a Jewish fellow getting
into a pay toilet.
3. Abe is coming back to Hungary by train from Austria. When the Customs people ask Abe
what is in the bag, Abe repplies, bird feed.
The customs people make Abe open the bag. The bag is full of rough cut diamonds. The customs people respond by saying: Abe this is no bird feed, to which Abe responds, he could care less, if they eat it fine, if they don't eat it, they get nothing else.

Folks in Hungary we tell Jewish Jokes.

[Phillip]

Q. Whats is the difference between roast beef and pea soup?
.
.
.
.
.
give up
.
.
.
.
.
You can't pea soup

[Zhenya]

Oh, you guys are awesome. I got so cheered up. Keep up the good work.
I'm thinking about posting one myself, but my brain is not working right now.\

Zhenya....