Argument for Romance

[CameoJoe]

Okay Forrest,

I argue that there is not enough romance in most people's lives because they don't consider it important or dont want to find the time for it or whatever. In Islam countries I doubt there is such a thing as romance as we never see or hear about these type things. Maybe the Koran does not recognize this natural human combination of sexes to happen?
What is romance? I know what it is in my terms. It's being close to someone you care about and doing things for the lady that make her feel special and very apprciated in my life. Sneeking up behind her and covering her eyes as I sneek a kiss on her cheek from behind are special things that make the day more pleasant. Holding her hands as we lay together on the couch make the feeling of togetherness very special. Talking in bed till the wee hours of the morning as if the time has no meaning is a wonderfully romantic thing.

CameoJoe (Let's argue...lol)

[Zbyszek]

OK Cameo Joe, I am taking up your challenge. Thank you for opening this thread and thanks to Irinka for a good idea about it. Unfortunately, English is not my first language, so I probably cannot fully comprehend all meanings of the word romance. For any case, I enclosed the etymological definition of the romance in French in the other thread ⌠My favourite romantic memories■, to make it more romantique LOL.
For me, romance always prefers imagination over reality and it also includes some mystery and intimacy. For that reason it (happily) cannot be fully defined.
It is interesting how public figures handle or used to handle their romantic love. I still think about opening a thread in History forum about the great romantic loves of the Rzeczpospolita Kings (ruling Ukraine as well). One of them Sigismundus II Augustus fell in love with a Lithuanian aristocrat named Barbara Radvill(XVIth century). The parliament considered their romance a public matter. Polish society was quite puritan at that time (I realize a negative connotation of this word but I can not find a better word for it). The PM▓s raged with fury over the possible marriage and they had enough courage to keep reminding the King about it. It has not become a case of Romeo and Juliet. Sigismund was clever enough to soften the parliament opposition with some privileges (not a good behaviour!)
The romantic love had a sad end because Barabara fell ill and died soon.Their romance became a domain of historic research (even some Ph.D. theses were devoted to this problem). Many researchers including surgeons(!) investigated the possible cause of her death which was widely attributed to the ⌠French disease■. Only the last research proved that she the most probably died of uterus cancer. No, kings should not lose their heads because of romance.
To my surprise, Gary Heart (unsuccesful candidate for the USA presidency) also had similar problems in the end of XXth century.
I treat Ukraine as a part of the world where romance could flourish. The erotic sphere of our life should remain a little bit undefined, hidden and imaginary. I hate a notion that I am a chemical factory producing hormons like any other industrial plant. For that reason, I dislike a naturalistic, explicit description of romance.

[CameoJoe]

HiYa,

That was very well understood what you wrote and I liked it. You carry romance to a new understanding here.
Can it be we are more than chemicals? Yes we are because as children we are still romantic without adulthood chemistry and kiss softly with romance in our minds and no conception of adult sex.
There is a difference between male and female and perceptions of romance in many ways. I argue that the female species desires these fantasies in a healthy way that is different from the male version but both are equally healthy.

CameoJoe

[Zbyszek]

Kasper, a title of my post is provocative but I think the erotic act itself is never dirty or clean itself. It is mostly pleasant LOL. Now seriously, that pleasure is a great gift and we should handle it with the utmost care.
What is most shocking to me? It is all swampy environment of dirty talk attributed to things which are wonderful. Look, when people curse heavily, they refer to the sex matters. That dirty context is something I can hardly accept. I realize of course it is a result of ignorance and fanatic, puritan attitudes in the past. CameoJoe came with an idea which is appealing to me. Really, we should love like innocent children who never think that kissing and hugging can be dirty.

[Edited by Zbyszek on 14th November 2002 at 23:10]

[CameoJoe]

HiYa,

Kasper you got some Kool ideas and opinions and I would never attempt to argue the validity of them because they are sincere. I like the last part best about the father thing.

When we are children the kissing and hugging in life is easy and free and takes only our natural effort to extend itself to the world. As we become older the chemicals take hold and erotic behavior evolves in a way more advanced way than our natural senses fathom on a daily basis. This is turn seems to define our sexes and the inticate differences we have in contrast to our simplest desires.
A romantic feeling of an adult seems to be produced from within and still with mystery and emotion but on a more contained level that seems to argue against itself due to the erotic or sexual expectation. In all it seems to me that without romance and those special feelings of caring for someone else that we are and always seeking to find a new level of the mystery of lova and the expectation of happiness.

CameoJoe

[forest]

Hey Joe. I totally agree [haha] you described it more or less as I would especially the bit about the couch. Its 17-30 here and in about an hour thats exactly what we will be doing . Also liked the bit about talking into the small hours whilst lieing in bed, We used to to that quite a lot and it was nice, but now its only when neither of us have work the next day. sad that is,nt it

[CameoJoe]

HiYa,

Thanks for the information on yourself and opinion. I assure you that in 20 years from now on a rainy day in October that if a complete stranger asks me why forest does not get to talk to his lady in the wee hours of the night as much as he would like then it's becasue he works.

Zb, Where are you? I've been out of the loop the last 48 hours doing some work that I could not put off and had a few solutions to things solved easily than I thought would be the case.

Dear Kasper,

I really like to read what you have to say because it means a lot to hear your perspective for various reasons.

(1) If you are 12-16 years old you are indeed ahead mentally than many of your peers.

(2) You laugh at things more than you worry about them it seems and this is a very healthy attitude to have.

(3) You seem to respond quickly and not wait for the political climate to assist you. Too many people have to put there toes in the water before they get in..lol

CameoJoe