What is a Wanker?

[Nonson]

What is a Wanker?

(And this guy really means it)


Howdy. I was hatched on May 3, 1970 to a wonderful set of breeders, Lois and Nicholas. It was quickly determined that I needed to be educated at a higher level. I chose Carleton University in Ottawa and after 12 years received my worthless B.A. in Economics. I am now married and unhappy. Uhh, happy, I mean happily married to my mail order wife, Darlene. I recently found out why she married me. She had no choice. My parents forced her too, at gunpoint, so as to permanently remove me from home. Now she is to blame for everything. Thank God!

B.T.W. I am a cripple. Please dont write nasty email to me (or go ahead, I couldn't give a ****!) I lost my left leg below knee on a fateful day in August, 1997 when an old blind ***** driving a Dodge turned into me on my beautiful, spotless Kawazaki Ninja. (Nooo, I'm not harbouring any anger anymore to the old fat blue haired @#$@ slut smoking mother@#%$@)
I will ride again, as soon as my leg grows back or I get some cash to buy a...sigh...real bike, a Harley Davidson.
Enough about me. Well, what did you want? For me to say your name too? Go to hell!


PERSONAL INTERESTS
Golfing, sex, bowling, gardening, sex, sunbathing, gold digging (you know what I mean Dave), sodomy, dope smoking, bird watching, beating up midgets, drinking, gambling, playing with myself, sex, wanking, pedicures, shopping, farting, sex, making cookies, playing french horns, country music, sex, making fun of Brent, picking on Keith about his dick size, slapping my old man's bald head, eating, sleeping, lifting weights, lazing around, doing laundry, reading foreign languages, decathlons, shooting automatic weapons at anybody.....

[Pierogies_4_Life]

Don't you have anything more interesting to say?

[UNCLE-JO]

mr Nonson, Good Morning!

I have a very embarrassing confession. Yep.

Do you remember our 'friend' - "StormFront" ??
I just discovered, it was my own Brother.
He's not a "Nazi", just one twisted son-of-a-***** with a fuc*ing sick sense of humor.
Unfortunately, his messages (USING MY ISP!!!) have got me "banned" from all V.C. sites.

I HOPE YOU ASS-HOLES ON ADMIN ARE READING THIS ?????
IT WASN'T ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Anyhow, at least I now know WHY I keep getting "zapped".

I want to talk to you about your last message.
Personally, I believe it all and I DON'T think you're a "wanker".
Actually, I pretty much guessed.
Truly.
We 'cripples' can often spot little tell-tale signs.
Ok. I'm not disabled, but I was and (fu*k!!) I know how it feels.
Seriously! I broke my back and neck in a military parachuting accident. The pilot said it was too windy to jump, our own officer over-ruled him and everyone landed safely - except me
Ha!! I 'parachuted' into the side of a fuc*ing building - and couldn't walk for 18 months.
Best of all, this happened shortly BEFORE our Government changed the law and said soldiers could litigate against the Defense Ministry. So, I was completely fuc*ed
Ok, they (still) pay me $23,000 a year NOT to work (which is a lot of money in my city) - but then there's the 'baggage' that comes along with it: an aluminum spine, addiction to Codeine and the knowledge that myself and 'Mr Arthritis' are gonna be spending a LOT of time together when I get older
My girlfriend would've tolerated all this, but I didn't want her plagued with me, so I ended 'it'.
She went down to Arizona, got hitched-up with a total ass-hole and he coerced her into robbing a store. Someone got shot (not by her), but, she's now doing '25' with the A.D.C
So !!!! I guess I am a "wanker" by any definition

Don't be bitter.

Ha. I guess I'll be back tomorrow, under YET ANOTHER screen-name, having been "zapped" again.
Well, fu*k 'em. We'll see who gets bored first, eh?

STEPHEN BAILEY

'Banned' from all VC sites, sentenced to death by the Scottish Taliban - and yet, still here

[Lady-A]

Hmmm...I see that you get around and that you sometimes let your nasty side out for some air here!

Well, your posts here make me smile too!

Take it easy,
Lady A.

[Nonson]

Hey Steve,

Most brothers are bastards, and all too often the love of our lives are the epitome of B.I.T.C.H.hood. What can I say? Been there done that. Got screwed up pretty bad myself not too long ago, it seems. Only saving grace was I wedded an M.D. and she got to pay most of the bills before, during, and after the divorce.

And Steve, there is a dictionary of tags. So get creative.

Nonson
03.10.01

[Nonson]

P_4_L,

Claiming you are bright enough to know the difference?

Don't we just love these volunteer straightmen?

Nonson
03.10.01

[becca]

I still have a "well preserved" tie-dyed shirt I wear from the 70's.

In my dictionary "The South of the Mason-Dixon Line Vocabulary," a "wanker" is a complainer and whiner. I'm beginning to think it has a double-meaning.

Do I qualify in the "cripple" club? My lung had a blow-out and now I can't fly.