On the lighter side - Jokes

[dobko]

George Bush goes to a primary school to talk to the kids and get a little PR for his campain. After his talk he offers question time. One little boy puts up his hand and George asks his name.

"Billy", responds the little boy.

And what is your question Billy?

I have three questions;
1 Why did we invade Iraq with out U.N. support?
2 Why are you still president when Al Gore got more votes?
3 What ever happened to Bin laden?

Just then the bell rang for recess. George then informs the kiddies they will continue after recess.

When they resume George says "O-K where were we?...oh that's right question time, does anyone have a question?"
(A little boy puts up his hand and George asks his name.

"Johny", replies the little boy. And I have five questions says Johny;
1 Why did the USA invade Iraq with out the support of the U.N.?
2 Why are you President when Al Gore got more votes?
3 What ever happened to Bin Laden?
4 Why did the recess bell ring 20 minutes early?
5 Where the hell is Billy?



Anyone else have a new one?

(Oops! Al Gore not John Kerry)



[Edited by dobko on 11th November 2004 at 21:26]

[dobko]

[dobko]

A man walks into Fredrik's of Hollywood to purchase some sheer lingerie for his wife. He is shown several possibilities that range from $250 to $500 in price, the sheerer the higher the price. He opts for the sheerest item, pays the $500 and takes the lingerie home. He presents it to his wife and asks her to go upstairs, put it on and model it for him. Upstairs, the wife thinks, "I have an idea. It's so sheer that it might as well be nothing. I won't put it on, do the modeling naked, return it tomorrow and keep the $500 refund for myself." So she appears naked on the balcony and strikes a pose. The husband says, "Good Lord! You'd think that for $500, they'd at least iron the damn thing!"

[andrewblow]

That's wicked Dobko........

Andrew

[nickcsadler]

I have also asked in mixed company..Why do women marry in white?? the answer being,of course, because it matches the colour of the other kitchen appliances... and yes I really am still alive :-))))

[Ulysses]

Why are girlfriends like tires (tyres)? Because after 50,000 miles of wear and tear they have to be replaced. I almost got killed for that one.

Originally posted by nickcsadler
I have also asked in mixed company..Why do women marry in white?? the answer being,of course, because it matches the colour of the other kitchen appliances... and yes I really am still alive :-))))

[dobko]

A blind man enters a ladies bar by mistake. He finds his way to a barstool and orders a drink. After sitting there for a while, he yells to the bartender, "hey, you wanna hear a blonde joke?" The bar immediately falls absolutely quiet. In a very deep husky voice, the woman next to him says, "Before you tell that joke, sir, I think it is just fair- giving that you are blind- that you should know five things; 1 - The bartender is a blonde girl. 2 - The bouncer is a blonde girl. 3 - I'm a 6 feet tall, 180- pound blonde woman with a black belt in karate. 4 - The woman sitting next to me is blonde and is a professional weightlifter. 5 - The lady to your right is a blonde and is a professional wrestler. Now think about it seriously, Mister. Do you still wanna tell that joke?" The blind man thinks for a second, shakes his head, and declares, "Nah not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times."