Joke

[nickcsadler]

Wendy was a prostitute, but she didn't want her grandma to know. One day, the police raided a whole group of prostitutes at a sex party in a hotel, and Wendy was among them. The police took them outside and had all the prostitutes line up along the driveway when suddenly, Wendy's grandma came by and saw her granddaughter.

Grandma asked, "Why are you standing in line here, dear?"

Not willing to let her grandmother know the truth, Wendy told her grandmother that the policemen were there passing out free oranges and she was just lining up for some.

"Why, that's awfully nice of them. I think I'll get some for myself," and she proceeded to the back of the line.

A policeman was going down the line asking for information from all of the girls. When he got to Grandma, he was bewildered and exclaimed, "Wow, still going at it at your age? How do you do it?"

"Grandma replied, "Oh, it's easy, dear. I just take my dentures out, rip the skin back and suck them dry.".........The policeman fainted.

[nickcsadler]

A Queenslander is drinking in a West Aussie bar when he gets a call on his mobile phone.
He hangs up, grinning from ear to ear, and orders a round of drinks
for everyone in the bar because, he announces, his wife has just
produced a typical Queensland baby boy weighing 25 pounds.
Nobody can believe that any baby can weigh in at 25 pounds, but the
Queenslander just shrugs, "That's about average in Queensland. Like I
said, my boy is a typical Queensland baby boy.
Congratulations showered him from all around and many exclamations of
STREWTH" were heard. One woman even fainted due to sympathy pains.
Two weeks later the Queenslander returns to the bar. The bartender
says, "You're the father of that typical Queensland baby that weighed 25
pounds at birth.
Everybody's been having bets about how big he'd be in 2 weeks, and we
were going to call you. So, how much does he weigh?

The proud father answers, '17 pounds"

The bartender is puzzled and concerned. "What happened? He weighed 25 pounds the day he was born!"

The Queensland father takes a long s-l-o-w swig from his XXXX, wipes his lips on his shirt sleeve, leans onto the bar and proudly says

.................."Had him circumcised"

[Rajkumar]

Top 10 things that sound dirty at Thanksgiving

. . but aren't


10. "Talk about a huge breasts!"

9. "It's a little dry, do you still want to eat it?"

8. "Don't play with your meat."

7. "Just spread the legs open & stuff it in."

6. "I didn't expect everyone to come at once!"

5. "You still have a little bit on your chin."

4. "How long will it take after you stick it in?"

3. "You'll know it's ready when it pops up."

2. "That's the biggest one I've ever seen!"

1. "How long do I beat it before it's ready?"


Posted by joachim at scotland.com

[Rajkumar]

A wife asks hubby how many women he had slept
with?
Husband proudly replies only u darling with others
I
was awake.

[Rajkumar]

Do u know why guys fart louder? Because in
between
his legs, there is 1 microphone & 2 speakers.

[Rajkumar]

A guy donated blood to his girlfriend. When they broke up,
he wanted his blood back from her.

So,
she threw a bloody kotex at him and said
"I'll pay u in monthly installments"!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Rajkumar]

Little girl was talking to her teacher about
whales.

The teacher said it
was physically impossible for a whale to swallow
a
human because even
though it was a very large mammal, its throat was
very small.

The little
girl stated that Jonah was swallowed by a whale.
Irritated, the teacher reiterated that a whale could
not swallow a human;
it was physically impossible.

The little girl
said, "When I get to heaven I will ask Jonah".
The teacher asked, "What if Jonah went to hell?"
The little girl replied,
"Then you ask him".