6th October 2002, 04:59
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Q: How many Poles did it take to determine that the Earth is NOT the center of the Universe?
A: Just one. Nikolas Kopernik (AKA Copernicus) was Polish. Unfortunately he could not prove his theory -- which "heretically" contradicted the officially held "scientific" belief sanctioned by the "infallible" Catholic Church that the Earth was the center of the Universe -- a heresy punishable by death in Medieval Europe. That proof wasn't secured until a hundred years later by Galileo, who had access to the newly invented telescope. Poland was also a hundred years ahead of England with its own version of the Magna Carta (which granted ordinary citizens major legal rights of protection from the state) and a few hundred years ahead of America in being the first nation since ancient Greece to experiment with Democracy -- although a disastrously stilted form, limited to the nobility. (Sort of like the U.S. Senate, come to think of it.) Q: How many WW2 Polish fighter pilots did it take to shoot down a Nazi plane? A: 1/9th. Polish fighter pilots flying in all-Polish squadrons of the RAF averaged 9 Nazi planes for each one they lost. Polish pilots in mixed squadrons of the RAF didn't fare so well -- averaging only 4 Nazi planes for each of their losses. Go figure. Q: How long did it take the Nazis to overrun Poland? A: About as long as it took them to overrun France and drive the first invading British army to the brink of disaster (before Hitler unwisely halted his attack, giving the Brits time to escape certain annihilation.) Of course, the French and British had a hell of a lot more time than the Poles to prepare; were not taken by surprise; and their nations had not been recently restored to the map after a 125 year partitioning by three mighty empires, with little or no help from their allies to rebuild their economies. Q: How do you save 90% of your people from the Black Plague while the rest of Europe loses half their populations? A: Seal your borders to stop the incursion of it, like Poland (and Holland) did. Q: Which vitamins are extra special to the Polish people? A: All of them. The very idea of vitamins and their effect on the human body was discovered by a Pole -- Casimir Funk. Q: How many Polish women does it take to discover radium? A: One. Maria Sklodowska (aka Madame Curie.) Q: How did the Poles save Europe from the Turks? A: In 1683, the Turks had smashed their way northward through Europe and were about to capture Vienna - - the seat of the Holy Roman Empire. Just like in the movies, the cavalry arrived in the nick of time -- in the form of Polish Hussars headed by King Jan Sobieski (the royal ancestor of beautiful and talented actress LeeLee Sobieski). The massive army of Christian knights attempting to defend this key city of Christendom was being cut to ribbons by the fast-moving, scimitar-wielding Turks on their magnificent Arabian horses. But the Polish Hussars were equipped with an ingenious special weapon -- a strange framework of long feathers jutting from their backs. As they charged down the hill toward the battlefield, the wind whistled through the feathers -- creating a ghostly moan which spooked the Turkish horses, throwing their entire cavalry into a panic. (Note: The Poles' horses had been specially trained to work with this sound effect.) If the Poles had not arrived when they did, all of Europe from Greece up through Austria and beyond might be Moslem today. (Which might not be a bad thing, of course, depending on your POV.) Q: How many Poles did it take to invent the coffeehouse? A: One. After the Battle of Vienna in 1683, a Polish knight claimed the stores of coffee captured from the defeated Turkish army, which were about to be burned by other Europeans as useless. He set up the first coffee house in Europe (in Vienna) and it was an immediate success. (This is debatable.) Q: How many Poles did it take to secure the decisive victory of the American Revolution? A: One. (With the help of many brave Americans, of course.) In 1777, the British were in a frustrating position and on the verge of military embarrassment in America. Having more or less pushed Washington's ragtag army about at will with the help of their German mercenaries and their own rugged troops, they had not managed to secure the quick and easy victory they were sure of. Gentleman Johnny Burgoyne, war hero and playwright, longing to sate his ego, concocted a plan to slice the New England "brain" of the rebels from its body in Pennsylvania and the lower Colonies. While Washington's army was called to Philadelphia to defend Congress, a Northern Division was dispatched to the Canadian border to prevent Burgoyne from taking the Hudson Valley and claiming his goal. Among those sent to the very Northern lines at Fort Ticonderoga was a recently arrived Polish freedom fighter named Tadeusz (Thaddeus) Kosciuszko, who was the first of a handful of European adventurers to contribute immensely to the American Cause. Having proven his worth in designing ingenious defenses for Philadelphia, Kosciuszko was sent to help fortify Ticonderoga. Unfortunately, his advise regarding the placement of cannon was dismissed as folly by chauvinistic glory- seeking incompetents in the American command -- which led to the humiliating rout of the American forces by Burgoyne's invading army from Canada. The British victory was swift and effective -- and owed its success directly to the maneuver originally suggested by Kosciuszko. While the Americans fled south with the British on their heels, Kosciuszko rallied a company of woodsmen to protect their retreat by sabotaging the landscape to slow the British pursuers. His tactics were so successful that the British army was slowed to a mile-a-day advance, giving the fleeing Americans plenty of time to escape and regroup near Saratoga. After the Americans reorganized their straggling Northern army and replaced the guilty General Schuyler with General Gates, who was more appreciative of Kosciuszko's talents and more open to his suggestions, Kosciuszko selected a new defensive position and designed new fortifications. (You can visit West Point to get the story in detail!) The resulting Battle of Saratoga is considered the turning point of the American Revolution. As soon as the news of this victory reached France, the formerly recalcitrant French officially joined in an alliance with America, sending thousands of soldiers and weapons to help the cause. Kosciuszko's excellent performance at Saratoga (and earlier, in designing the defenses of Philadelphia) helped to open the door for LaFayette, Von Steuben, Pulaski and other foreign officers -- whose services had met resistance by the countless ambitious American officers jostling for positions of glory. The Polish Count Pulaski organized the first American cavalry. Among his cavaliers was a sharp young officer named Lee -- whose grandson was to be the famous Confederate hero Robert E. Lee. Pulaski is a bit more famous than Kosciuszko. First, because his name is easier to pronounce for the Anglo- American tongue. Second, because he was the first major European figure to die for the American Cause. Q: How many Polish Jews did it take to finance the American Revolution? A: One. Haym Salomon was an immigrant from Poland who spoke several languages and had a keen grasp of economics. When Robert Morris was appointed to raise money for the American cause -- which no one really believed was a viable investment until the Battle of Saratoga (see above) -- he went in desperation to Haym Salomon, who raised millions while taking only a fraction of the currently acceptable fee for such brokerage. Morris, who initially distrusted Salomon because of his heritage, eventually relied more and more on him to "do the math" and get the job done. Able to wheel and deal with the many foreign traders arriving in Philadelphia in their native tongues, Salomon was virtually a one man international bank. Ironically, Salomon died in debt after raising millions for America and donating his own fortune to the cause. (He'd also risked his life as a spy in the earlier part of the war and was condemned to be hanged by the British for arson, but that's another story.) On ten separate occasions Congress met to determine how much his heirs were owed by the Committee of Revolutionary Claims. In 1862, they determined the amount to be approximately $650,000. They rounded this figure off to an "even" hundred thousand. But his heirs were never paid a penny. Q: Why were so many Jews in "anti-Semitic" Poland at the start of WW2? A: Because in the Middle Ages, two great Polish kings had issued Charters of Sanctity to the Jews, which led to Poland being considered "The Promised Land" -- until Swedish and German invaders arrived, bringing an influx of anti-Semitic beliefs traced back to certain anti-Jewish writings attributed to Martin Luther. Q: Why didn't Communism spread throughout Europe when the Reds took Russia? A: Just as the Turks were stopped at Vienna, the Polish army under Jozef Pilsudski squelched the Bolshevik drive into Europe at the battle known as "The Miracle of the Vistula." After WW2, the Poles were "rewarded" by being tossed to the Soviet bear by their allies. Q: Who started the end of Communism in modern Europe? A: The Solidarity Movement starring Lech Walesa. The "Round Table" in Poland in 1989 helped establish a free Poland without bloodshed -- and preceded both "the Velvet Revolution" in Czechoslovakia and the "fall of the Berlin Wall." 
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7th October 2002, 21:43
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Quote:
Thanks a lot for this thread. I was quite surprised reading it since I was sure it would be another abuse, or offence directed at Polish people. I don't know if you are Ukrainian, or not, but if you are - I wanted to say 'thank you' & I will always remember your kind words about my country - it is a rarity on this forum with only one exception - that of Tuchaj Bej. If you are Ukrainian, I want to tell you I've got two good Ukrainian frinds; one here, in the UK & another one in Lwow. The latter one is 7 years' old & his name is Romek. I met him in front of the Opera House in Lwow, where he was asking for money. Now, please do not misunderstand me. I am not saying this to stress anything, only the circumstances of our meeting. There were other older boys than himself who wanted to take Romek's money away. Then I gave him all the money I got left & he gave me a huge hug & actually cried. I told him to go home & share the money with his sister & to avoid those big boys, bullies who rip him off. Since that time we've been friends & I would like to take him to Krakow when I go back to Poland.I send him cards from the UK as well as letters. I am not saying it to suggest I am some sort of Lady D,or something. I merely intend to point out that this is what makes me really happy - the fact I could help & be friends with this little boy. Because I aslo know what it means to be poor. Please, do not read this story as SENTIMENTAL. I'd rather you read it as a starting point for realtionship between people of different cultures, nationalities & finally with different degree of good luck in life. Halina
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10th October 2002, 03:40
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Hi Halina
I don't visit the history thread to often but there were a few threads that caught my attention. I was a bit surprised at some of vicious attacks aimed at Poles.
You have to keep in mind that any 16 year old with his mother's PC and access to the internet can get on the message boards. At this age, teenagers discovering their identity, some are blinded by their nationalistic feelings...they think that being patriotic means belittling other countries. I don't think this message board is representative of Ukraine. I'm not Ukrainian (American of French, Portuguese, Spanish ancestry) but I did join this board to learn more about the country. I have some friends from Ukraine. Quote:
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15th November 2002, 22:33
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Attention Attention
ATTENTION ATTENTION: POLAND ATTACKS ITSELF!!!!!! (nestor pistor)
You know no matter what the fu cking facts are this goes to prove with what me and my friends have spoke about. Pollacks think that they are the inventors of everything. That its all them that did it all. Stupid pollacks
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