Help me!

[Pukerainian]

I live on Ukraine. Bad. Take me from here. In America -- dangerous. Because anthrax. In England -- too. I want in Germany or better --in Switserland. Who from Switserland -- send me invitation. I will to live in your house 5-6 months
Warn you -- I smoke in room. You well cook? I eat only good food. Drink expensive vodka, not wanna to poison me cheep vodka! Drink cognac "Hennessy". Give me job on $10000 in month. Sex -- not to propose! With not serious proposals -- not to address!!!
Thank you.

[johncullen]

no chance !

[andrewblow]

Then may I suggest that you don't start off by trying to ingratiate yourself to us with warnings about your bad behaviour and expensive tastes. That will be guaranteed to get a "NO" from all quarters.

Or are you a floosie taking us all for a ride ??

Hard to tell these days !!!

Andrew

[Lilly]

This fool has got to be kidding.April 01 is a long way off.There are more holes in this story than Swiss cheese!

LillyNomad

[observer58]

and smells like Limburger.

[Lilly]

Yes John, and it stinks all the way to Canada too. BTW, why does Limberger cheese smell like stinky feet?

LillyNomad

[Foggy]

Reminds me of a joke... (Maybe I told it here before; if so, just chalk this post up to my having another "senior moment!")

Jake and Mavis were husband and wife; Jake ALWAYS went to sleep in church, much to the chagrin of Mavis. One Saturday while shopping she chanced to open a jar of Limburger cheese and had an inspiration. She bought it and put it into her purse. Next morning, when Jake went to sleep during the sermon, she opened the jar and stuck it right under his nose. He said, quite loudly, "Mavis, get your stinking feet out of my face!"

(laugh here)

Thank you.