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Old 15th August 2012, 17:59
Tracker9195 Tracker9195 is offline
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Help with understanding female Ukrainian dating and romance practices

I corresponded and talked with a 28 year old Ukrainian girl about marriage and family. We seemed highly compatible and we just spent 17 days together in Crimea. During this period everything went well except for two things. Romance and money. She was not comfortable holding hands in public and kissing in public the entire trip. In private a polite kiss on the cheek was ok. She gave me simple thank you kisses after I purchased something. There was never a passionate kiss or any private time or intimacy the entire trip. She said she thought we were compatible and she was interested in me as your friend, lover and husband. She complimented me many times on my appearance, style of dress and more. She said she had a great time with me. I discussed her reluctance for kissing, touching and being alone and she said she needed time. I explained that affection and romance were very important to me as discussed earlier in email and chat. The second thing that bothered me was her expectation that I "win" her heart by spending time and money on her with entertainment, going to the spa, many gifts not only for her but also for her sister and parents. I explained that this is highly unusual in America and considered very rude but she insisted this is normal in Ukraine and for her. She explained that it was part of dating in Ukraine and that Ukrainian women often want to know that the man will support her needs and wants. I returned home feeling very bad that I either do not understand basic human nature (desire for intimacy) and the Ukrainian culture (maybe it is not for me). Or, maybe I was used for fun and gifts by this girl and her Interpreter. She also would not use my Interpreter. In the end I spent a lot of time and money and feel we are compatible and many ways EXCEPT for romance and money. Both are important. She wants to continue getting to know me and says she wants me as her husband. On the last day I met her mother. Her mother was nice but later said our age difference was too great. I am 52, attractive, healthy, well educated, professional, stable and offer someone a lot. For me the age difference is barely acceptable but I decided to meet her from a pool of many because I simply liked here the best. Now that I am home I can say that I am very torn and I hate the thought of being scammed. If her romantic behavior and expectations for money are reasonable for Ukrainian girls, the culture may not be right for me. Lastly during this trip we discussed many things and the area of the greatest difference seemed to be in many differences in dating such as Ukrainians ONLY dating one at a time or Ukrainians considering themselves a couple because they are dating and not because they both explicitly agree to being a couple with conditions and many other differences.

1) What are typical dating practices in Ukraine regarding paying for gifts, paying for entertainment, etc. for two people that are new to each other?
2) What are typical romantic practices in Ukraine regarding public kissing and affection, passionate kissing in private and general expectations for sex...for two people who have known each other for several months online and who spent 17 days together and where apparently there is mutual attraction and sincere interest in a life together?
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